At this point in my life, I’m going through a rough transition. I just moved 2500 miles from home with my fiancée, lost my car in the process, and am several thousand dollars in debt (not counting student loans that will have to be paid once I graduate).

Financially, I’m in trouble. This is the first time I’ve been without a job since I was 15, and finding one here is turning out to be increasingly difficult. I’m overdue on several personal loan payments, being harassed about them, massively overdrawn on my checking account, and behind on credit card payments. Suffice it to say that this is one area where I especially need to get my shit together. Currently I’m in the interview process for a Library Aide position here at UAT, so hopefully that turns out for the better and I can start getting back on my feet.

Academically, I’m doing passably well, but not as well as I’d like to be. There is at least one class that I’m going to fail this semester, and that’s not really a great way to kick off my career here. I’m doing better than I did during my 5 semesters at Buffalo State, but I still have problems with procrastination and organization. I’m going to have to step things up and focus myself if I’m really going to excel here.

Emotionally, I’m in a bit of a confusing spot. Katie and I have gone on this life-altering journey together, but things are not perfect between us. They never were, but I find myself unsure of how to handle myself in light of the current circumstances. A year ago I left her, and the simplest explanation is because she was addicted to WoW. That hasn’t changed. She quit in order to get me back, but 6 months later she was near-begging me to let her play again. I decided to trust her to control herself this time around. I’m the kind of person who would rather give the benefit of the doubt than be unreasonable. Well, things were ok for a bit, but it quickly degenerated into her playing 10 or more hours a day on average once we settled in here. This brings back some very bad memories for me, and affects me in an extremely negative way. And yet, for all we’ve been through, she doesn’t seem to care. We have our good times, but the more she plays WoW the fewer and farther between they come. I’m not really sure how things are going to work out, at times.

Personally, I think I’ve developed quite a bit in a short amount of time since coming here. I’ve let myself regress somewhat, but my outlook on life and my relationship has changed. I still fall back on a lot of the old bad habits when things get stressful, especially between Katie and me, but I’m much more self-aware these days, I have a lot more clarity, and I’m more determined to get what I want – and what I deserve.

After having landed the Library Aide position, my focus and drive to succeed increased dramatically. I managed to begin paying off my debts, and even to save some money as well. I’m not exactly wealthy or prepared for an emergency, but I’m a lot more financially stable than I was a year ago. At least I’m back in the black.

My job is going well; I get along great with the Librarians, and I enjoy helping students find what they need and keeping the place orderly. It’s not very much or very hard work and I’m making decent money at it. Since I’m not swamped with too many hours like I used to be back in Buffalo, I am able to focus on getting my school work done and still have some time to relax and goof off.

During my second semester here I took filler classes due to my failure to register early, but I made damn sure that I stayed on top of my work and learned everything I could. After a somewhat shaky start, I managed to finish the semester with four A’s and a B. I also remembered to register right early, and during the summer semester I finally got down to some classes that are important to my major. I did nearly as well as my second semester, and managed to be a bit more physically active as well. I’ve lost 15 pounds since last December.

The room mate and I got along much better, through the end of last year, though I think he and Katie still hated each other. Speaking of Katie, she’s still playing WoW. For a long while we avoided another apocalyptic blow-out over her addiction, but it came inevitably, around the middle of the summer. She didn’t want to lose me because of it again (though she nearly did), so after quitting for 2 months, she’s playing lightly on a trial-basis. Last-chance kind of scenario. I think once she realizes that playing isn’t worth risking our relationship anymore, she’ll give it up. It’ll help that she’s starting to get more homework the further into our education we get, too.

Personally? I’ve rarely been happier with myself or my situation. I’m even more aware than I was beginning to be last year, I’m nowhere near as confused about my feelings or about what I want out of this place, and I’ve got more self-confidence and motivation than I can ever remember having. I’m even writing again, and working on publishing some of my poetry. With the money I’ve saved over the past year, I’m treating myself to the upcoming Tool concert in January. I haven’t seen them since 2003, and I am stoked.

I’m getting it together, and it feels great. I’m glad I did it before it was too late.

Strengths	Weaknesses	Opportunities	Threats
Compassionate	Martyr Syndrome	Library Aid Job	World of Warcraft
Genuine	Lazy	Success in School	Procrastination
Intelligent	Careless	Get in Shape	Junk Food
Belief	Lack of self-confidence	Get an Internship	Paranoia
Problem-solving	Lack of direction	Get a Good Job after Graduation	Fear and Inaction

Strategies to overcome

How I will maximize my strengths:

• Seek roles in which I am paid to solve problems or in which my success depends on my ability to restore and resolve. Leverage my Restorative talents not only to tackle existing problems, but also to anticipate and prevent problems before they occur. If I share my foresight and solutions with others, I will prove myself to be a valuable partner.
• Organize my belongings and thoughts to maximize efficiency. As I gather and absorb information, I should be aware of the individuals and groups that can most benefit from my knowledge, and be intentional about sharing with them. Carefully avoid supporting someone (including myself) who is consistently struggling in his or her role – instead suggest a new role.

How I will strengthen my weaknesses:

• Don't over-invest in losing causes. My natural inclination to see the best in people and situations can create a blind spot that will keep me from moving on to more opportune situations.
• Remind myself why my work is important and how it will make a difference in my life.
• Set aside time to ensure that I am balancing my work demands and my personal life.

How I will seize my opportunities:

• Deliberately build relationships with people I consider to be "big thinkers." Their example will inspire me to focus my own thinking.
• Get involved on the front end of projects and initiatives, rather than jumping in at the execution stage.
• Don't be afraid to give voice to my values. This will help others know who you are and how to relate to me.

How I will mitigate my risks:

• Partner with someone who has strong Futuristic talents. This person can energize me by painting a vivid picture of the direction in which my values will lead.
• Remember that I cannot give what I do not have.
• Use my Restorative talents to think of ways to "problem proof" my work and my life. Identify existing and potential issues, and design systems or processes to prevent errors in the future.
• Goal setting

Goals for 2008

1) Utilize the exercise room I live next door to at least twice a week and lose 15 pounds in the next 12 months to get in shape and improve self-image à self-confidence.
2) Maintain a regular blog (at least one post per week) to record my insights, ideas, and experiences that might be valuable to me in the future.
3) Regiment my time to make more effective use of it and increase efficiency in school and work. This means keeping and actively following a schedule.
4) Write regularly (at least 3 times per week) to improve writing so that I may at least begin the publication process in the next 12 months.
5) Foster better financial habits so that I can rise out of debt and start saving.



List your first goal here: Lose 20 lbs.
Describe the ideal outcome: What will it look like when this goal is complete?
I will have lost the chub, the love-handles, and will be able to see the inside of my belly-button again. I will have gained muscle mass and look more toned.
Resources: What are you going to need in order to accomplish this goal?
I will need the weight room next to my room, as well as a scale and a way to record progress. Real food, instead of the crap I’m used to eating.
Tactical Plans
What are you going to do: Work out at least twice a week next door, possibly more if I get bored or if I don’t think it’s enough. I will improve my eating habits, as well – less junk food and soda; more water, juice, fruit, and vegetables.
Then what: Weigh myself once a week and record the results in a Google Doc so that I have a running record of my progress.

List your next goal here: Maintain a regular blog.
Describe the ideal outcome: What will it look like when this goal is complete?
I will have gained considerable self-awareness, insight, and possibly ideas for creative writing.
Resources: What are you going to need in order to accomplish this goal?
I will need to either make use of my Wiki page that I have already created, or create an entirely new page dedicated solely to blogging. I will also need to allot time for this acitivity.
Tactical Plans
What are you going to do: Take the time each week (or more often, if the spirit moves me) to record my thoughts, ideas, and experiences.
Then what: After some time I will review my writings and reflect upon their significance and think about how they might be useful or valuable to me.

List your next goal here: Regiment my time to increase efficiency and focus.
Describe the ideal outcome: What will it look like when this goal is complete?
I will have become more time-conscious, and learned how to manage my time effectively as well as balance personal concerns with academic or work concerns.
Resources: What are you going to need in order to accomplish this goal?
I will need to make use of my Google calendar and perhaps my cell phone’s calendar as well to give me mobile, to-the-minute reminders of what I should be doing and when.
Tactical Plans
What are you going to do: Keep track of important appointments and due dates using Google calendar, and keep a regular routine including time for assignments, personal time, time with Katie, and time to sleep.
Then what: While attempting to adhere to my regimen I will likely encounter disruptions and unexpected circumstances that will require me to step outside my schedule. Hopefully I will learn to adapt my time to these instances and become flexible while maintaining a schedule (still finding time to get done everything that needs to be done).

List your next goal here: Write regularly.
Describe the ideal outcome: What will it look like when this goal is complete?
I will have gained a considerable amount of new material, developed some of my old material, and be on my way toward publication.
Resources: What are you going to need in order to accomplish this goal?
I will need to requisition a quiet place and time to facilitate my writing. I will also need to make use of my peers on deviantArt to obtain critiques and advice on how to improve my writing. I will need something to write in, as well; likely a notebook and pencil set aside specifically for weekly writing.
Tactical Plans
What are you going to do: Take the time a few times each week (or more often, if the spirit moves me) to write creatively.
Then what: Submit my writings to deviantArt as deviations and maybe even contest submissions in order to obtain others’ thoughts on how to improve my writing. After nearly a year, I will evaluate the poetry and prose I have collected and see if I find any of it publication-worthy.

List your next goal here: Foster better financial habits.
Describe the ideal outcome: What will it look like when this goal is complete?
I will have gained considerable ground in the steady climb out of debt. I will also have accumulated savings for the first time since I was a teenager.
Resources: What are you going to need in order to accomplish this goal?
I will need a job, and I will need self-restraint to ensure that I’m using my money wisely and saving appropriately. It would also behoove me to keep an excel spreadsheet documenting all my expenses and income for a few months so I can get an idea of my monthly or weekly budget.
Tactical Plans
What are you going to do: Land the library job. If for some reason I don’t get the job, then actively and daily pursue other employment options in the area and study interviewing techniques to improve my chances of being hired.
Then what: Save, save, save. Make my payments on time. Keep track of spending habits and income, and formulate a budget for myself.


Remember; when we set goals for the future the gap between time and effort create stress, emotional and creative. Emotional stress is managed by creating tactical plans and check lists; this prevents us from lowering the gap by changing our goals or lowering our vision. To make the vision for the future current reality we must take steps to change, but these changes come with a time delay. As long as we are stuck in a time delay, and we have taken steps to change, all we can do it wait.